Nursery Rhymes

17 05 2009

We got this book of famous nursery rhymes for R from a great friend. During the day when I lose inspiration on what to sing or talk about the R, I read (or sing) from the book (she loves the way mommy doctors Hickory Dickory Dock. It turns her to all smiles). Today Hubbs was reading it to her and came across this…

Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater
Had a wife and couldn’t keep her
Put her in a pumpkin shell
And there he kept her very well
(*insert* illustration of Peter pushing his wife’s head down into a giant pumpkin)

As he finishes reading it to her he stops and laughs out loud! “What? You’ve got to be kidding me!” Then he says, “Peter’s wife was promiscuous so he had to lock her in pumpkin to make her behave… and that is a nursery rhyme? Seriously? Let that be a lesson to you, R!” And laughs.

I guess I never thought of this way (really, I just never really comprehended the words!), but it is a little twisted. So is, “It’s Raining it’s Pouring.” A nursery rhyme about an old guy who doesn’t wake up the next morning??

Oh well, what can you do?


Coveting your advice…

13 05 2009

Question #1:

I want to do a traditional-like baby book. Anyone have any good resources for those that tailor to adoption?

This is the one I am thinking of….


I want to start telling R her adoption story so that I have it right before she really understands what I am saying. I am not sure how to do this. Thankfully, R’s story is beautiful. Obviously I need to start with a very juvenile version, and I want it to include God and R’s birthmom both chosing her for us and us for her. So, I just want lots of advice. What things should I include? What should I avoid saying? What things have you heard other’s saying that you now know not to say?

Or should I really even tell a story at this point or just tell her she was adopted and read her books about adoption (like this one reccommended by Rebekah- check it out!!) and allow her to ask questions as she gets older and tell her about her birthparents? I didn’t really think too much about this before she came. I mean, I knew I would tell her (obviously) I just didn’t think too much about how I would do.

So, any advice would be appreciated!!

Twenty things…

9 10 2008

Who has read this book?
What do you guys think of it?
I read it about a year ago. I see it everywhere and hear everyone talk about it. It scares me a little. Today I went to that oh-so-large-everyone-knows-it-online-bookstore/everythingstore and read reviews on it. I was glad that the book is a little controversial. If you read this book, regarless of what you think about it, go read the reviews, both the good and the bad.
This is the review breakdown.
177 Reviews
5 star: (102)
4 star: (14)
3 star: (4)
2 star: (20)
1 star: (37)

Doesn’t it seem odd that most people either LOVED or HATED this book?

When I was reading the book, there were some things that really freaked me out. So I talked to my friends that were adopted at birth. Both went out and read the book and both would have rated it a 1 star(one of them would have given negative stars if she could have).
Personally, I think the book has some really great thoughts… things I wouldn’t have thought about otherwise. But I also think in many cases it is a bit extreme and a bit negative. So for me, I am taking everything in it with a grain of salt. My friends are extremely well adjusted, awesome individuals. I recognize that each child is different and my child may experience more difficult reactions to their adoption than my friends, but I also recognize that there are things that I could do to increase their likelihood of having more difficult reactions to specific parts of their adoption.
What do you guys think? Disagree with me if you do! Tell me your perspective!

Balance Beam

18 08 2008

One of my biggest concerns about parenting is how to balance adoption discussion. How do I make adoption something that is casual and normal to my child, without shoving it down his/her throat to the point where it is the sole thing that defines them.

When my mom was visiting, I was talking to her about the list of adoption books that I was interested in and showing her the ones I already have. She said, “these look good, but you don’t want to have TOO many.” I had planned on purchasing every one I could get my hands on… but I didn’t think I could get TOO many. I’ve been thinking about it a lot lately and I can see how my library could have TOO many. I want there to be plenty of books. I want there to be books that only have a hint of adoption in them, books where adoption is the central theme, and books that have nothing to do with adoption. But where should the balance be?

I think for kids, MOST of the time, my kids should just be kids. Sometimes, however, they are going to be adopted kids. It is inevitable that sometimes they will feel like an adopted kid, or think about being an adopted kid. Also, I think sometimes some things they do, think, and feel with have a hint of adoption in them. But I think the majority of the time, I want my kids to think, feel, and act like just an every day kid.

So this is my plan (feel free to comment): I am going to structure my library based on that. Most of the books I want to be your average, every day book. A nice selection of books I want to have a hint of adoption in them, and then a few more with adoption being the central theme.

Keep in mind, I love to read. I love to read because reading was something we did every day, but it was also a privilege: something you got to do 15 minutes past your bedtime. I plan on having a library with literally hundreds of books (after all, that is how big MY library is, shouldn’t I afford my kids that same luxury).

So, what do you guys do? How do you balance adoption in your every day life, and in your library?

9 08 2008
I went to a used book store today. Yay, go used books! I read 3 adoption books and bought one.

This is the one I bought. I think it is cute and fun. I want there to be a really diverse selection of adoption books in my children’s library, and I like that this one is less educational and more fun. I was very excited because I was going to buy it yesterday for $16 and bought it today (in wonderful condition) for $3.

I read this one. I really liked it as well, but it isn’t pertinent to my situation. It is about an older brother who is waiting and preparing for his little sister to be adopted from China. It is really cute and educational and in the right situation, a must have.

Then there is this one. I want someone else to read it and tell me what you think. I like the message of the book for sure, but I don’t know that I like the way that it is conveyed. I guess I just don’t like the way that the title introduces the concept so abruptly. I know my kids will experience the “real” questions and I want them to have the information to answer questions, but it just seems very in your face. Does that make sense? I think I will buy it anyway (it wasn’t used, it was new. In a used bookstore?)

I’m enjoying this used book thing. It’s fun. I’ll keep scouring the book shelves for more little treasures!

Books Books Books!

6 08 2008

For several months I have been doing research on children’s books on adoption. There are tons and tons out there, but I can’t seem to get my hands on any. Every book store that I go to has about 1 or 2 and that’s it. It is very frustrating and I don’t want to spend a bunch of money of books when I don’t agree with the messages and verbiage. Thankfully, Becky posted about the adoption books that she reads to her children, and gave a little synopsis of each. It was so incredibly helpful and I appreciate it so, so much.

Check out this site here – it is a complete resource for adoption books of all kids! It’s great! So, I went to this site and looked up the books to order, then I ran across several more that looked interesting. Here are the ones that I am planning on purchasing:

Twice Upon a Time: Born and Adopted- Elea.nora Patte.rson
How I Was Adopted – Joa.nna Co.le
A Blessing from Above – Pa.tti Hen.ders.on
Tell Me Again About the Night I was Born – Ja.mie Cur.tis
My Family is Forever– Na.ncy Car.lson
Adopted and Loved Forever– Anne.tta E. Delli.nger and Pat.ricia Mat.toz.zi

These are ones that I ran across and am considering, but I need some feedback. Does anyone have, or has anyone read any of these books? I am looking for positive or negative feedback so I don’t waste money! Thanks in advance!

Any feedback would be great! Also, if you have feedback on some of the ones I am for sure on, go ahead and give it! Thanks!


Adoptive Families magazine (if you don’t have a subscription, get one!) August issue rates these children’s books as “must haves”

Happy Adoption Day by McCutc.heon
We Wanted You by L.iz Ro.sen.burg
Borya and the Burps by McNa.mara
Motherbridge of Love by Xin.ran
Horace by Ho.lly Ke.ller
Every Year on Your Birthday by R.ose Le.wis
Through Moon and Stars and Night Skies by An.n Tur.ner
In My Heart by M.olly B.ang
Megan’s Birthday Tree by La.urie
My Mei Mei by E.d Youn.g

None of which are on my list…. What to do, what to do?